The girl with the trust issues

I see these memes on Facebook all of the time with the caption: “This is why I have trust issues!” I laugh at these when I see them but sometimes these memes are a reality to some people…. And sometimes, they are a reality to me. The truth is I do have trust issues. I am talking about Jesus trust issues.

It is very easy to say yes. Yes, I trust in Jesus and move on when someone wants to talk to you about it. Believe me, I would know. However, to be honest, sometimes I struggle with doubt. 

In the Bible, there is a man named Ananias. I believe a lot of times he gets overlooked but he had to have a lot of trust in God. Now, if you know anything about Saul, you know he was a terrible, terrible person. He killed Christians and threatened anyone who believed or spoke about Jesus. Saul was on the rode to Damascus when the Lord hit him with a light and blinded him. Now, this is where Ananias comes into the story. Ananias was a man of God. The Lord spoke to him and told him to go to Saul. Ananias knew about Saul and all of his previous actions against Christian and he questioned the Lord. Nevertheless, the Lord told Ananias to go anyway. I don’t know about you but this is where I have the trust issues. I wonder if Ananias worried on his way to see Saul. Did he wonder if he was about to be killed? - Because I would be! As the story unfolds, Ananias was filled with the Holy Spirit and Saul was no longer blind. Saul was transformed by his encounter with God and God used Ananias to help. 

I love this story because I know the trust that Ananias had to have in God to go to where a murderer might kill him. It makes my trust issues seem smaller in comparison. I recently read the Bible verse that says, “Trust in the Lord with ALL of your heart.” I have read this verse millions of times but this time it was different. It does not say trust in the Lord with some of your heart.  It clearly says trust in the Lord with ALL of your heart. I am learning that to trust God with the outcome of my life means that I have to lay down some of my trust issues and know that He is in control. This is very hard for a person who is a control freak; however, the Lord is working on me. 

A couple of weeks ago, Hadleigh wanted to do my makeup. If you have ever let a four year old do your makeup, then bless you! Yet, the thing is it was so easy for me to trust Hadleigh with makeup and pointy brushes around my eyes.  However, I can’t trust God to do what He promised He would do. Seems messed up right? It is…

I’m working on it. If I can trust a four year old with blue lip-gloss, I can trust the Creator of the universe with my life. 

My prayer is that if you are having trust issues, whether it is about finding job, a relationship, a friendship, or even with your children, know that God has everything under control and He is waiting for us to wholeheartedly trust in Him and His plans. When we do trust in Him with ALL of our heart, then He can do His job! 

P.S. Here’s a picture of Hadleigh doing my make-up and you will see just what I am talking about with the trust, because the girl is all over the place. However, I don’t know how you couldn’t love her!