God, Why me?

Maybe if I was prettier, he wouldn’t have broke up with me?

Maybe if I was smarter, I would have got into the college of my dreams?

Maybe if I was funny, I would have more friends?

Maybe if I was more experienced, I would have got that job I had been praying for?

Do any of these questions sound familiar? I have been there, too. I have been that girl that has to wake up every morning and push through the pain of rejection and hurt. I have been that girl that puts on a brave face for everyone around me, secretly questioning in my heart, “God, Why me?” “Why did he have to break up with me?” “Why didn’t I get the job I wanted?” “Why does her life seem perfect when mine is falling apart?” God, this is completely and totally unfair. If you have ever felt this way, I am here to share some good news today.  I recently have been reading a book by a wonderful author named Lysa TerKeurst. The book is called Uninvited. While reading the book I came across this quote, “This breaking of you will be the making of you. A new you. A stronger you.” When I read this quote, I felt that peace that only the Lord can give. Y’all know what I am taking about… It is an experience like no other. Then it hit me. Why not me? My whole life I have been trying to fill a hole in my life with things of this world. My joy has been dependent on my circumstances instead of my Savior. A little over a year ago my Paw-Paw had a stroke and the whole situation stole, not only my joy, but also the joy of many people in my family. I never realized that I was letting my circumstances, all the pain and heartache, steal my joy. I pushed through the situation looking for joy in earthly things instead of in my Savior, Jesus Christ. Only recently (in the past month), did I realize that I was placing all my hope in this world instead in the One who came to save this world.  My life was shook up in a different way this past month. I was honestly shocked and disappointed in the whole situation. I questioned God, why me? I have tried to live my life the way You wanted me to so why couldn’t I have this one thing. It is hard to trust God’s goodness when it feels like you’re drowning in heartache. Then my pastor sent me a text with the most perfect scripture “Greater is He that is in me, than He that is in the world” (1 John 4:4). This verse has become my anthem. When I feel sad, lonely, or rejected. I repeat this verse in my heart. It is my constant reminder from Jesus that everything is going to be okay. I have learned to trust Jesus more than ever before. His plans for my life are far greater than anything I could ever imagine. I am not saying that this is an easy process or overnight you will feel better and have complete joy. I am saying take everyday as a new day to find something good in your life. Just remember that whatever rejection, heartache, or pain you are going through, Jesus has already seen you through it. He is making you better, stronger, and braver than you could ever imagine. He is preparing you for something so much greater than your current circumstance. So, next time you start thinking God, why me? Change your mindset to Why not me?

P.S. When my Paw-Paw had his stroke the doctors told us he would never make it out of the hospital. Here is my Paw-Paw nearly two years later at home walking, eating, and enjoying his life. My God is bigger that our circumstances!!! :)